Well today I found out that I do indeed have a great marraige. When you have only been married to one person for what seems like a lifetime how do you really know. You can think things are good but maybe they really are not. Look at how women stay with abusive men thinking they have it good. Or perhaps you think it isn't all that great like many seem to think and end up leaving the marraige only to find out that it really was good. You just didn't have any thing to compare the marraige except what your friends tell you about their marraige. Of course...those always sound very imperfect.
Well today I realized something I had not before. Yesterday and today I had patients that I assisted with where their spouse is going through cancer treatment. Both people expressed to me that their partner did not seem to be compassionate about their health. Different reasons were stated but through the conversation I came to realize that my husband and I truly do have something unique. I am the person that is there to run defense for him. There are days when he can not do things for himself because he is worn out battling this disease. That is where I and others who have someone in this position need to step it up and be the one to be strong. When you are married to someone you know them. You know every aspect of their life. The face that person makes indicates many things to us. I personally know my husband so well that I know long before he does that his diabetes is causing him a low blood sugar. I can take one look at him and read him like a book. He too can do that towards me. In the past it was more about reading between the lines if he was tired, or bored, or fed up with me or ready to make love. You all know what I am talking about. The look. Now it is about being the partner I said I would be many years ago. The one who is guarding him and being the bad guy if I have to be. (They will get over it and if they don't I believe they just don't really get it anyway).
I guess that is a part of what love is and can be.
I got a kick in the buttocks about this today. I told my husband about the other people I had talked to and he let me know that he appreciates what I do so much. He said he would like to believe that he would do the same for me if things were reversed. I would like to think so too. I do know that I would want someone standing guard for me.
Peace.
1 comment:
The way both of you are there to defend one another means a lot to all of us who are watching and learning from you. It's a blessing and a treat for me to see.
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