We had a great weekend this Easter weekend. We got to visit with our children and grandchildren. It was very busy but all great and fun.
It is always interesting to see your children with their children trying to raise them perfectly......like I know I tried to do. I remember putting so much pressure on myself to be the perfect mother and for my sons to be the best behaved with the cleanest faces and all the in between. Times are different now. The way to be perfect is to give them the educational toys and opportunities... even at one or two or three.... that will give them that edge. To start them in a sport and get them the edge they will need to be the best. To be a parent who uses reason and quiet voices to discipline.
I know now without doubt that I failed to be the perfect mother and my children (even as wonderful as they are) are not perfect. I look back and realize that I put too much on myself as a mother. Now I am not sure if they respect me for all I did or question it all. All I do know is that I did the best that I could do with the resources and knowledge I had at the time. Would I do things different now? Well... of course... a few things. You can't change the past as we all know so I am changing who I am as a mother. I am becoming more independent. I am feeling the need to be a woman who is much less a mother or grandmother now. I am a woman who is living out her life and for the first time not taking care of someone or raising someone and that feels good.
Peace,
